New Dear Santa Please Slip A New Back And A Pair Of Knees Under The Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee

Made-to-Order Graphic Apparel – Bold & Comfortable

Imagine scrolling past this and NOT getting it. Yeah, we can’t either. Soft Gildan® cotton, studio-quality print, and a fit that just works. You’re welcome.

📸 Mockup is a tee – but we’ve got you covered. This design ships on 4 styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Crewneck & Hoodie. Your call, your style, made just for you.

Why Everyone’s Grabbing This

• 🎨 Studio-Grade Print – Eco-friendly DTG ink that bonds permanently. No cracking, no flaking, period.
• 🧵 Buttery Soft Fabric – Gildan® Ultra Cotton & Heavy Blend. OEKO-TEX certified – safe on your skin.
• 👕 Move Freely – Classic unisex fit with taped seams. The tear-away label means nothing scratching your neck.
• 🇺🇸 Wear It With Pride – Made with American cotton from the US Cotton Trust Protocol. Quality from the ground up.

What It’s Made Of

• T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: Pure cotton (5.3–6 oz) – breathable comfort, durable construction.
• Crewneck & Hoodie: 50/50 blend at 8 oz – pill-resistant fleece with spandex ribbing.
• Note: Sport Grey contains a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for color consistency.

Choose Your Style

Not sure about sizing? Check our charts below:

1. Find your color in the chart above.
2. Match your measurements to the size guide.
3. Add to cart and check out securely.

When Will It Arrive?

• ✅ Crafted in: 1–3 business days.
• 📦 Standard US: 3–7 business days.
• ⚡ Express US: 3–5 business days.
• 🌍 International: 7–14 business days.

Each piece is printed on demand after you order. Double-check your size before checkout. Size-related returns aren’t available, but reach out if you need any help – we’ve got you.

🛒 Browse the collection at DistortTees.com. Every piece, premium quality.