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DistortTees
Official Im Not Making Resolutions This Year No One Likes A Skinny Sober Person Anyway Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Official Im Not Making Resolutions This Year No One Likes A Skinny Sober Person Anyway Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Regular price
$18.94 USD
Regular price
$26.94 USD
Sale price
$18.94 USD
Taxes included.
Shipping calculated at checkout.
Quantity
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Exclusive Design – Premium Print on Gildan® Cotton
Imagine scrolling past this and NOT getting it. Yeah, we can’t either. Soft Gildan® cotton, studio-quality print, and a fit that just works. You’re welcome.
📸 What you see is a T-Shirt mockup, but don’t stop there – this design comes in 4 different styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Crewneck Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Choose your favorite and we’ll make it just for you.
The Good Stuff
- 🎨 Studio-Grade Print – Eco-friendly DTG ink that bonds permanently. No cracking, no flaking, period.
- 🧵 Feels Like a Hug – Gildan® fabric with OEKO-TEX certified dyes. Premium comfort from the inside out.
- 👕 Designed for Real Life – Classic silhouette, taped shoulders, itch-free tear-away label. Wear it anywhere.
- 🇺🇸 US Cotton, Real Quality – Proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol. Feel good about what you wear.
Materials & Specs
- T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: 100% US cotton, 5.3–6 oz – soft, breathable, classic fit.
- Sweatshirt & Hoodie: 8 oz, 50/50 cotton/poly blend – cozy, durable, resists pilling.
- Fabric note – Sport Grey (90/10 cotton/poly) has a slight poly blend for that classic heather finish.
Color & Size Guide
Find your size and pick your color – it’s that easy:


- Use the color chart to explore your options.
- Check the size chart for measurements.
- Select, add to cart, and enjoy!
Shipping Details
- ✅ Production Time: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 US Delivery: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ US Rush Option: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 Rest of World: 1–2 weeks.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 Shop the full catalog at DistortTees.com. Bold designs, premium comfort.
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