Official Ive Cooked For People I Should Have Poisoned So Yes I Do Have Self Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee

Unique Graphic Wear – DTG Printed on Gildan® Blanks

First impression? Fire. Tenth wash? Still fire. Printed directly on Gildan® cotton with pro-grade DTG ink that bonds to the fiber. No cracking, ever.

📸 Image shows a tee, but this design is printed on 4 styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Select your preferred style at checkout – every piece is made to order, exactly how you pick it.

Why You’ll Love It

• 🎨 Built to Last – DTG printing means color is part of the fabric, not sitting on top. Wash without worry.
• 🧵 Buttery Soft Fabric – Gildan® Ultra Cotton & Heavy Blend. OEKO-TEX certified – safe on your skin.
• 👕 Move Freely – Classic unisex fit with taped seams. The tear-away label means nothing scratching your neck.
• 🇺🇸 From American Farms – US Cotton Trust Protocol certified. The good stuff, sourced the right way.

What It’s Made Of

• T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: Pure cotton (5.3–6 oz) – breathable comfort, durable construction.
• Sweatshirt & Hoodie: 50/50 Heavy Blend (8 oz) – pill-resistant with spandex cuffs & waistband.
• Fabric note – Sport Grey (90/10 cotton/poly) has a slight poly blend for that classic heather finish.

Find Your Perfect Fit

Choose your favorite color and find the perfect fit:

1. Browse colors and compare with the chart.
2. Use the size guide for the best fit.
3. Add to cart and you’re all set!

Shipping & Returns

• ✅ Made in: 1–3 business days.
• 📦 US Shipping: 3–7 business days.
• ⚡ Rush Delivery: 3–5 business days.
• 🌍 Worldwide: 1–2 weeks.

Each piece is printed on demand after you order. Double-check your size before checkout. Size-related returns aren’t available, but reach out if you need any help – we’ve got you.

🛒 Browse the collection at DistortTees.com. Every piece, premium quality.