Officials Gnomes Sleeping Is My Drug My Bed Is My Dealer And My Alarm Clock Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Officials Gnomes Sleeping Is My Drug My Bed Is My Dealer And My Alarm Clock Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Fresh Design, Premium Fabric — Printed Just for You
Imagine scrolling past this and NOT getting it. Yeah, we can’t either. Soft Gildan® cotton, studio-quality print, and a fit that just works. You’re welcome.
📸 Seeing a T-Shirt? That’s just the preview! This exact design is also available on Long Sleeve, Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Just choose your style — we print and ship it your way.
What Makes It Hit Different
- 🎨 Zero Compromise — Vivid, detailed DTG print. Throw it in the wash — the design isn’t going anywhere.
- 🧵 Skin-Friendly & Soft — OEKO-TEX certified Gildan® fabric. No harsh chemicals, just pure comfort.
- 👕 Your New Daily Driver — Relaxed classic fit with reinforced seams. Tear-away tag = no more neck itch.
- 🇺🇸 Sustainably Sourced — US Cotton Trust Protocol. From farm to fabric — responsible at every step.
Fabric Breakdown
- T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: Pure cotton (5.3–6 oz) — breathable comfort, durable construction.
- Crewneck & Hoodie: 50/50 blend at 8 oz — pill-resistant fleece with spandex ribbing.
- Sport Grey uses a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for its signature heathered tone.
Pick Your Color & Size
Browse colors and sizes to find your perfect match:
Available Colors
Gildan 5000 — Unisex T-Shirt
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 36 in (91.4 cm) |
| M | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86.4 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
Gildan 18000 — Unisex Sweatshirt
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) | 33.5 in (85.09 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) | 34.5 in (87.63 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) | 35.5 in (90.17 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) | 36.5 in (92.71 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) | 37.5 in (95.25 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) | 38.5 in (97.79 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) | 39.5 in (100.33 cm) |
Gildan 18500 — Unisex Hoodie
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) |
Gildan 2400 — Unisex Long Sleeve Tee
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27.95 in (71 cm) | 36.22 in (92 cm) | 33.46 in (85 cm) |
| M | 29.13 in (74 cm) | 40.16 in (102 cm) | 35.04 in (89 cm) |
| L | 29.92 in (76 cm) | 44.09 in (112 cm) | 36.61 in (93 cm) |
| XL | 31.1 in (79 cm) | 48.03 in (122 cm) | 38.19 in (97 cm) |
| 2XL | 31.89 in (81 cm) | 51.97 in (132 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 3XL | 33.07 in (84 cm) | 55.91 in (142 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 4XL | 33.86 in (86 cm) | 59.84 in (152 cm) | 38.98 in (99 cm) |
Tap a style above to view its chart. Measured laid flat.
- Use the color chart to explore your options.
- Check the size chart for measurements.
- Select, add to cart, and enjoy!
When Will It Arrive?
- ✅ Crafted in: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 Standard US: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ Express US: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 International: 7–14 business days.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 Shop the full catalog at distorttees.com. Bold designs, premium comfort.