Officials I Fear No Man But This Thing Scares Me Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Officials I Fear No Man But This Thing Scares Me Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Made-to-Order Graphic Apparel — Bold & Comfortable
Real talk: life’s too short for boring clothes. This piece is DTG-printed on genuine Gildan® blanks — vivid colors, premium feel, zero compromises.
📸 Mockup is a tee — but we’ve got you covered. This design ships on 4 styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Crewneck & Hoodie. Your call, your style, made just for you.
What Makes It Hit Different
- 🎨 No Cheap Print Here — We don’t do vinyl or heat press. Pure DTG — ink in the fabric, color that lasts.
- 🧵 Premium Feel — Genuine Gildan® blanks. Ultra Cotton for tees, Heavy Blend for hoodies. You’ll feel the difference.
- 👕 Throw It On & Go — Relaxed unisex fit with reinforced shoulders. Comfortable from morning to midnight.
- 🇺🇸 From American Farms — US Cotton Trust Protocol certified. The good stuff, sourced the right way.
Fabric Specs
- T-Shirt (5.3 oz) & Long Sleeve (6 oz): 100% cotton — airy, comfortable, all-season wear.
- Sweatshirt & Hoodie: 50/50 cotton/polyester (8 oz) — warm, pill-resistant, rib with spandex.
- Sport Grey uses a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for its signature heathered tone.
Find Your Perfect Fit
Find your size and pick your color — it’s that easy:
Available Colors
Gildan 5000 — Unisex T-Shirt
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 36 in (91.4 cm) |
| M | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86.4 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
Gildan 18000 — Unisex Sweatshirt
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) | 33.5 in (85.09 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) | 34.5 in (87.63 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) | 35.5 in (90.17 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) | 36.5 in (92.71 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) | 37.5 in (95.25 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) | 38.5 in (97.79 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) | 39.5 in (100.33 cm) |
Gildan 18500 — Unisex Hoodie
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) |
Gildan 2400 — Unisex Long Sleeve Tee
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27.95 in (71 cm) | 36.22 in (92 cm) | 33.46 in (85 cm) |
| M | 29.13 in (74 cm) | 40.16 in (102 cm) | 35.04 in (89 cm) |
| L | 29.92 in (76 cm) | 44.09 in (112 cm) | 36.61 in (93 cm) |
| XL | 31.1 in (79 cm) | 48.03 in (122 cm) | 38.19 in (97 cm) |
| 2XL | 31.89 in (81 cm) | 51.97 in (132 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 3XL | 33.07 in (84 cm) | 55.91 in (142 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 4XL | 33.86 in (86 cm) | 59.84 in (152 cm) | 38.98 in (99 cm) |
Tap a style above to view its chart. Measured laid flat.
- Check the color and size chart above.
- Select your style, color, and size.
- Add to cart and proceed to checkout.
Shipping & Returns
- ✅ Production: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 USA Standard: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ USA Rush: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 International: 1–2 weeks.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 Browse the collection at distorttees.com. Every piece, premium quality.