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DistortTees
Officials Minion If I Woke Up And Nothing Hurt I Would Think I Was Dead Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Officials Minion If I Woke Up And Nothing Hurt I Would Think I Was Dead Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Regular price
$18.94 USD
Regular price
$26.94 USD
Sale price
$18.94 USD
Taxes included.
Shipping calculated at checkout.
Quantity
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Statement Apparel – Premium Quality, Printed on Demand
Imagine scrolling past this and NOT getting it. Yeah, we can’t either. Soft Gildan® cotton, studio-quality print, and a fit that just works. You’re welcome.
📸 Image shows a tee, but this design is printed on 4 styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Select your preferred style at checkout – every piece is made to order, exactly how you pick it.
Why You’ll Love It
- 🎨 Zero Compromise – Vivid, detailed DTG print. Throw it in the wash – the design isn’t going anywhere.
- 🧵 Skin-Friendly & Soft – OEKO-TEX certified Gildan® fabric. No harsh chemicals, just pure comfort.
- 👕 Fits Like It Should – Classic cut, taped neck & shoulders, tear-away label. Nothing scratchy, nothing awkward.
- 🇺🇸 US Cotton, Real Quality – Proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol. Feel good about what you wear.
Fabric & Construction
- T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: 100% cotton (5.3–6 oz) – lightweight, breathable.
- Fleece (Sweatshirt & Hoodie): 8 oz cotton/poly blend – warm, smooth surface, anti-pill finish.
- Note: Sport Grey contains a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for color consistency.
Choose Your Style
Find your size and pick your color – it’s that easy:


- Find your color in the chart above.
- Match your measurements to the size guide.
- Add to cart and check out securely.
Shipping Details
- ✅ Production Time: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 US Delivery: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ US Rush Option: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 Rest of World: 1–2 weeks.
Your order is freshly printed just for you. Make sure to check the size chart before ordering. Size exchanges aren’t possible for made-to-order items, but we’re here if you need anything.
🛒 Find your next favorite at DistortTees.com. Style, comfort, quality – guaranteed.
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