Official We Found Life On Mars But We Still Cant Find The Epstein Files Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Official We Found Life On Mars But We Still Cant Find The Epstein Files Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Bold Design, Soft Fabric — Your New Everyday Favorite
That feeling when someone stops you and says ‘yo, where’d you get that?’ — that’s what this is. Premium Gildan® cotton, DTG-printed so the colors hit different and never fade. Your new go-to, trust us.
📸 What you see is a T-Shirt mockup, but don’t stop there — this design comes in 4 different styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Crewneck Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Choose your favorite and we’ll make it just for you.
Why This Stands Out
- 🎨 No Cheap Print Here — We don’t do vinyl or heat press. Pure DTG — ink in the fabric, color that lasts.
- 🧵 Feels Like a Hug — Gildan® fabric with OEKO-TEX certified dyes. Premium comfort from the inside out.
- 👕 Comfort First, Always — Taped neck, reinforced shoulders, tear-away tag. Built for all-day wearability.
- 🇺🇸 Good Cotton, Good Vibes — US Cotton Trust Protocol member. Sustainable, premium, American-grown.
Materials & Specs
- T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: Pure cotton (5.3–6 oz) — breathable comfort, durable construction.
- Sweatshirt & Hoodie: 50/50 Heavy Blend (8 oz) — pill-resistant with spandex cuffs & waistband.
- Note: Sport Grey contains a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for color consistency.
Pick Your Color & Size
Find your size and pick your color — it’s that easy:
Available Colors
Gildan 5000 — Unisex T-Shirt
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 36 in (91.4 cm) |
| M | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86.4 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
Gildan 18000 — Unisex Sweatshirt
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) | 33.5 in (85.09 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) | 34.5 in (87.63 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) | 35.5 in (90.17 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) | 36.5 in (92.71 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) | 37.5 in (95.25 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) | 38.5 in (97.79 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) | 39.5 in (100.33 cm) |
Gildan 18500 — Unisex Hoodie
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) |
Gildan 2400 — Unisex Long Sleeve Tee
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27.95 in (71 cm) | 36.22 in (92 cm) | 33.46 in (85 cm) |
| M | 29.13 in (74 cm) | 40.16 in (102 cm) | 35.04 in (89 cm) |
| L | 29.92 in (76 cm) | 44.09 in (112 cm) | 36.61 in (93 cm) |
| XL | 31.1 in (79 cm) | 48.03 in (122 cm) | 38.19 in (97 cm) |
| 2XL | 31.89 in (81 cm) | 51.97 in (132 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 3XL | 33.07 in (84 cm) | 55.91 in (142 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 4XL | 33.86 in (86 cm) | 59.84 in (152 cm) | 38.98 in (99 cm) |
Tap a style above to view its chart. Measured laid flat.
- Review the color & size charts.
- Select your preferred options.
- Place your order — easy as 1-2-3.
Delivery & Handling
- ✅ Production: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 USA Standard: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ USA Rush: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 International: 1–2 weeks.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 More to love at distorttees.com. Designed for you, printed with pride.